Not conforming!

It's been a few days since I've written anything - and to be honest I've had a bit of a crazy few days - mixed emotions over certain things, anger at others, growth in other areas...  It has been a bumpy ride!  Sometimes I think that's the journey that God can take you on, or life in general really.  So here are a few snippets from the journey this week!

So Thursday saw me very angry.  Yup.  I'm not perfect.  I get angry.  Not that anger is always a bad thing, but this time it was.  So I got a bit angry at certain things and probably had a few thoughts and maybe even said a few things I shouldn't have which I'm in the process of sorting out with God, but at the time I was mad at God, and some people.

Basically to cut a long story short, (and please note, in illustrating this I am not trying to offend, I have thought long and hard about this and have waited to blog, so that it is not written in anger but in love and self control), I got annoyed at some of my closest Christian friends for making me feel a bit unloved and forgotten about.  I know this wasn't their intention, and it was as much me being tired and reading into something in a bad way, but I felt a bit let down.  However, it made me think...  Sometimes I let people down and forget about people.  Sometimes I get so busy and so focussed on what I am doing that I forget to answer messages, call people up, spend time with people and check how they are doing.  I am all for 'love your neighbour as yourself' but do I always do this?  I guarantee that there are plenty of people in my lifetime who I have let down.

Further to this, (and please note I am talking about myself and not referring to anyone else), sometimes I get so focussed on my world and what is happening to me currently in my circumstances that I forget to 'think outside of the box' and remember those who aren't currently about.  I forget people who I care about.  I forget about important friendships I have up north because I'm now down here.  I forget to ask after my friends in London because I am based in Watford.  I  know this is perhaps a little out of context but Romans 12v1-2 says 'Do not conform to the pattern of this world'.  Now I know usually we rightly take this to mean that we shouldn't conform to 'the world' in terms of its love of money, views on sexual 'freedom', dog eat dog, getting drunk every weekend, etc.  However is it possible to read this verse in terms of 'don't get so conformed to and ruled by and blinded by your own personal world and your own personal friendship groups and your own personal circumstances that you forget everyone who isn't inside that world right now'? We need to remember those people who we love, even if they are 100's of miles away.  We need to build people up and make them feel loved and valued, even if they don't feature in our day to day activity.  So come on, let's make an extra effort to love people today.  Send someone a message you haven't spoken to in a while.  Ask how someone is doing.  Single people, ask your married friends out on a night out - it might be what they need and miss.  Married people, don't just hang out with other married people, include us singletons too. Christians, stop hanging out in your Christian cliques and start asking your non-Christian friends out too.....!  (Again, no offense meant to anyone - I'm voicing the sometimes left unspoken and just bringing some of these potential stumbling blocks to the surface... bear with me!)

Further to this,  my thoughts went on like this... 'are we sometimes so busy doing Christian that we forget to be Christian?'  I know I definitely fall into the former category at times.  Leading a community group last year at times meant that I was so tired after a Wednesday night, that on a Thursday night I would rather be on my own and shut away from my non-christian housemates whom I love dearly.  I was snappy with them, didn't have time to socialise with them and was sometimes rude to them.  What kind of example and demonstration of love was this?  No no no!  I was so busy doing Christian stuff and thinking I was Christian, that I forgot to be Christian and live out my life as a Christian.  Yes we all have bad days, yes we are human, YES do all of the amazing things you do at church or for the Kingdom - but don't forsake people because of it. 

And finally.  Today I read in Genesis 45 that Joseph, despite having been bullied, sold into slavery and forgotten by his brothers, upon meeting them again and finally revealing his identity, he was so grateful to have them back in his life that he wept, embraced them and provided everything for them and their families.  Joseph could have been so angry, and he had every right to be!  He was next to Pharaoh in terms of power.  He could have had his brothers killed, imprisoned, tortured... but no he left aside his anger and loved.  Caroline, despite not even having any real reason to be angry about, you've been told!