Free to be you without the mess. Thank God for that!

Oh My Goodness! What an amazing revelation I had today - I can't wait to share... It all came from this tiny verse in Hebrews... Hebrews 7v3 'Without father or mother, without genealogy, without beginning of days or end of life, resembling the Son of God, he remains a priest forever'. A bit strange and random you may think. Read on! It's great! Now according to the ever trustworthy Wikipedia, this verse is referring to Jesus. You need to bear this in mind as I explain my revelation. Right, so today I've had a hideous day. It's been really busy, I've had a massivly long day teaching, followed by parents' evening and a load of stuff crop up that I've had to deal with. In addition to this, I had a pretty intense, overwhelming session with my psychologist yesterday. Don't worry, I'm not going too personal - I've been seeing this lovely lady to help sort some anxiety attacks out. It's been really intense at the moment and we've been delving into all sorts of family history, personal history, background, events, childhood, parenting, friendships, relationships and so on. I've felt so warped by a lot of these things in the past, and seem to have been carrying a lot of baggage round with me which is just weighing me down and down and down. I seem to deal with small bits, empty some of the smaller bags, but then haven't properly dealt with the bigger, deeper underlying stuff, which I've then warped even more, based my identity on and argh! So following on from yesterday I felt completely beaten by my past, warped by the relationships I've had, and completely lost in who I am, where I've come from and so on. I just don't seem to know who I am or what I am, because I've allowed myself to be so influenced and shaped by 'stuff'. (Not that this is directed outwardly at all, this is actually all from within - so please don't panic!). Then BOOM. I read this verse. Now we have mentioned that the 'guy' in Hebrews being referred to is Jesus. Who was without father or mother, without geneaology, without beginning... Therefore this person was COMPLETELY and UTTERLY free to be HIMSELF and who he IS and WAS always destined to be. No parents to accidently or purposefully lead him astray or burden him with issues, no family history with inherited traits or curses, no past to hinder him and warp his views, identity and so on. And then BOOM. If we are in Jesus and if Jesus lives in us and if we are children of God and inheritors with Him, if we are made in the image of God/Jesus then don't these rules apply to us? Are we not FREE to be WHO WE ARE IN CHRIST? No pressure, no warped history, no family curses, no misleading parents, no generational sin, no tangled, messy relationships to hinder our growth. You know I was bullied a lot as a child and throughout my growing up. This was later added to by a series of harmful relationships with guys and plenty of other stuff which really has impacted the me you know and see today. Now whilst I know that God has changed me, removed a lot of my past, weeded the bad stuff out - I still struggle. But it is SO good to know that I am not defined by that stuff; that I am FREE to be ME, the ME God created, without pressure, hindrance, hurt, heartache and so on. MY IDENTITY is in CHRIST and his FREEDOM. Not some kid who called me fat 20 years ago which has impacted me every since. Not some abusive partner who undervalued me. No No NO! Live this guys - you are free from the generational tangles, past history, grueling friendships which hindered rather than helped. You too are free to be WHO YOU ARE, who you were created to be, without the mess! Awesome! Hope this makes sense!

Journey Poem!!!

Helloooooo I've been meaning to share this for a while. It was a poem I wrote about journeying a few weeks ago at Free to Worship. Enjoy!!! Come on a journey with me, Come, I have so much to show you. Look at the sunrise, the sunset, the colours of dawn, the brightness of day. Look at the leaves, how they flutter in the cool breeze. Look at the gentleness of the waves as they lap the shore. I have so much to show you. Listen to the birds as they sing in chorus, The hills, the mountains almost touching heaven. Hear the sound of the rivers running to bring life giving water. Look at the lightening how it brightens and pierces the night sky. Smell the scent of the dew on freshly cut grass. Taste the sweetness of a warm evening's sun dancing off the sand, the salt in the air. Look at the mighty hills, the sky, the sea, the ocean as it roars. My greatness has no limits, my splendour has no bounds. Look at your heart, how I've melted and am melting the darkness away. See how I can change your pain into dancing. Look into your heart as I wash it clean. Think about how, when you can't go on, I can. When you end, I've already begun. Think about these things, how I chose you, have you life, intimately designed your being, each strand of hair on our head, your fingerprint; not one is the same. You are wonderful. And I choose you to journey this with. I have so much to show you. Take my hand, walk with me. I won't go too fast, I'll carry you when you're tired. I'll feed you when you're hungry, I'll cleanse you when you're dusty. Don't give up, not yet. But come with me, Let's journey this together as one. I have so much to show you.